The (Un)branded: Issue #003

The (Un)branded is a newsletter at the intersection of business, culture and brand. It’s where business meets culture, both are brand, and all three pretend they aren’t constantly influencing each other.

Google and the AI Battle

Google is back (even though they were actually never gone)! After briefly worrying about OpenAI, they've realized the ultimate killer app isn't a clever chatbot, but simply stapling Gemini to every single service they already dominate, from Search to Workspace. Their massive scale and built-in consumer base are now conveniently framed as a feature, not a terrifying monopoly, creating an undeniable advantage in the AI deployment race. Now that they’ve successfully convinced investors that AI is a guaranteed, massive revenue stream, the CEO is publicly begging for national AI regulation. Nothing says “we are absolutely winning this corporate war” like asking the referee (in this case, the U.S. government) to help you trip the competition by imposing rules they are uniquely positioned to handle. The true arms race isn't for better algorithms, it's for enterprise contracts and who can generate the most passive-aggressive geopolitical talking points to keep rivals busy. Good luck, everyone else; Google just updated the world's operating system.

Amazon vs. Starlink

Welcome to the least relatable corporate rivalry on Earth, featuring two billionaires who hate each other enough to pollute Low Earth Orbit with competing satellite constellations. Amazon's Project Kuiper, complete with the very catchy 'Leo' antenna, is finally ready for testing and deployment, joining the ultimate game of high-altitude chicken against SpaceX’s Starlink. This isn't primarily about connecting the unconnected; it's about proving who can deploy a multi-billion-dollar fleet faster, purely out of spite and a thirst for infrastructure dominance in the final frontier. It’s a vivid demonstration of how next-generation infrastructure (the kind that requires massive, generational capital expenditure) is increasingly being commanded and funded by the same three or four tech giants who already control everything on the ground. The lesson for the rest of us? The future of global internet access will be brought to you by the same two companies that already deliver your groceries and host your website, whether you like it or not.

Cyber Week Sales Amidst Economic Anxiety 

Records have been broken! Everyone spent a lot of money, making the headlines look fantastic for retailers! But before anyone pops the champagne, the fine print reveals a less celebratory truth: consumers only bought things because they were heavily discounted, and most of it was essential stock-up items, not splurges. Shoppers, particularly the wealthier Gen X and Boomer demographics, are using Black Friday and Cyber Monday like a highly strategic budgeting tool, snapping up necessities with the grim efficiency of financial survivalists. Retailers are now staring down a 'highly promotional holiday,' which is corporate speak for "our sales volume looks great, but our profit margins are about to get absolutely annihilated." The cycle continues: the media reports record revenue, while the industry simultaneously deals with record headaches and margin compression. It’s the festive season of financial contradiction.

Major Retailers Undergoing Resets 

It's a tough world out there when your core business model relies on people physically visiting a dimly-lit store that isn't a giant Costco warehouse. This past week saw a desperate flurry of 'strategic shifts' that are really just last-ditch attempts to stay relevant. Kohl's finally found a new permanent CEO (we wish him the fortitude of a seasoned general), Foot Locker is doing the retail equivalent of throwing out all its old stock and praying for a turnaround, and Value City Furniture just checked into Chapter 11 citing, naturally, the never-ending housing crisis. These aren’t forward-looking pivots; they are desperate maneuvers in an ongoing retail apocalypse where 'thriving big-box/e-commerce giant' and 'bankrupt mall anchor' are rapidly becoming the only two options. The gap is widening, and the inflation-sensitive consumer is showing zero loyalty to the struggling middle.

Goldman Sachs and Energy M&A Activity 

While the tech media is obsessed with which CEO is the biggest 'disruptor' of the week, the real grown-ups in the foundational industries are quietly consolidating their assets for stability. Goldman Sachs, deciding it needed to get even more Goldman Sachs, just bought Innovator Capital Management, essentially making its asset management offerings bigger and harder to ignore. Simultaneously, the energy sector is engaging in a polite but aggressive land grab in the Permian Basin, proving that even a global push for renewables can't stop the big fossil fuel players from buying up the most crucial pipes, compressors, and gathering firms. The takeaway here is clear: when in doubt, merge with the competition, consolidate market share, cut costs, and focus on the unsexy, scaled infrastructure that actually runs the world's economy. These acquisitions are not about growth; they're about survival and cost-effective dominance in a geopolitical and economically uncertain landscape.